Feuding Friends
by Graveygraves
Summary: For years Reid and Garcia have tried to catch each other out for April Fool's Day - but this year it is personal! A bit of fun for the April Fool's challenge on Chit Chat for Author's Corner. Please R&R. This is unbeta'd


**Feuding Friends**

**OK this is my attempt for the April Fool's Challenge for Chit Chat on Author's Corner. This is a little out of my comfort zone – my stories tend to be angst or romance based. But here goes. By the way this is unBeta'd – as she has more than enough of my stuff to wade through at the mo.**

**No idea where this is set time wise (before all the nasty happenings of series 6 as JJ and Emily are about but Seaver is not on the scene). Guess that's one of the bonuses to fan fiction – it doesn't have to be grounded in the everyday goings on.**

**. . .**

**Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. **

**Chinese Proverb**

Garcia was determined this year was to be the last. Win or lose she was calling an end to their annual feud. It was starting to get silly, as it had been blatantly pointed out to them by Hotch last year:

"_It's not that I'm opposed to a joke, but when it affects others, then enough is enough."_

But it wasn't enough. Penelope had to have one last chance for revenge. Just this time she would have to take it out of the office. This year it was personal!

As Penelope entered Reid's apartment to set up this year's master plan she couldn't help but reminisce over the tricks her and Reid had played on each other. It started so innocently the first year; salt in her coffee, instead of sugar, and hot pepper sauce in his sandwiches. Who would have realised it would lead to an annual battle to make a fool of the other.

Making a fool of a certified genius wasn't easy either. She had to admit, it took planning, and lots of it. She prided herself on her dedication and commitment to the cause. This meant she had soon learnt to originate her pranks in the one area Reid rarely ventured: technology.

She started simply by setting his speaker volume to maximum, so that he woke up the whole bull pen when he switched on, to be honest she had heard it in her office.

Then there was the fake memo, that only Reid got, about how they were being limited to only one cup of coffee per day and that they had to fill in a request form for any additional cups, which had to be forwarded to management for approval. Oh how Reid had fell for that one. She had received ten requests for him by midmorning and she didn't approve them all. That got him back for switching her coffee to de-caf the year before. _Caffeine deprivation can do strange things to a person._

Then last year she set up his auto-spell on his computer so that every time he typed in one of his colleagues names into a report it replaced it with a phrase of her choosing. So SSA Morgan became SSA Chocolate God, Prentiss was Princess, Rossi changed to Italian Stallion and so on.

When Hotch read the first report from Reid he was quick to call him into the office. Reid hadn't noticed the changes, guess speed reading does have its down falls! When she was summoned Garcia knew Hotch hadn't seen the funny side and then they received the whole 'affect other people' lecture. Garcia was glad she stuck to altering Unit Chief Hotchner to Unit Chief The Man. It could have been so much worse.

So now, thanks to JJ's help, Garcia was stood in Reid's apartment. She had quickly located his laptop in his somehow appropriately messy study. Resisting the urge to move everything around, as he had previously done to her, she switched the laptop on and made herself comfortable. She wanted to be out quick.

JJ had lent her Reid's spare key and had invited him over to dinner, so he could spend some time with Henry. Penelope was to call JJ when she left so that JJ knew she didn't have to stall him any longer and all was safe for him to return home.

As the start up screen came up Penelope made a mental note to take to Reid about password choices – she was in on the first attempt. _Your mother's name is way too obvious Cupcake; you should know better, _she muttered to herself as she got busy setting up her prank, ready for tomorrow's April Fool's day tradition.

He would have to go out of his way to beat this one.

. . .

Reid was late. He was sure JJ wouldn't mind but he had to stay and set up for tomorrow, plus he wanted to make sure Garcia was out of the building before him this year, so that she couldn't set up any nasty surprises. He hadn't appreciated getting into trouble last year, but that wasn't going to stop him making sure he got his own back this year.

He had to snigger to himself as he stood in her office, looking for an appropriate victim for this year's prank. They had had some fun over the years. Plus he enjoyed the challenge of trying to catch Garcia's out. Most people assumed that under Garcia's blonde hair was a complete airhead, but he had long ago realised that Garcia was much more intelligent than she gave herself credit for.

Looking at all the trinkets she kept close to her he remembered the time he moved all the things around in her office. He had never understood how someone who came across as so scatty and manic needed such a regimented office. If you moved a screen by an inch it was enough to send her into melt down.

So to follow that, the next year he had stuck everything down on her desk. Well then she couldn't complain that things had been moved, could she? It had taken ages after work. The janitors had thought him completely mad, but he knew her domain was the best place to attack.

This year he found himself in the same familiar surroundings, considering his next move. Then he spotted just what he was looking for. He profiled criminal minds daily, now he was using that knowledge to cause havoc in 'Penelope World'.

Once everything was in place, he left. Hoping he wasn't too late for dinner at JJ's.

. . .

Reid was settled at his desk enjoying his first mug of coffee and scanning the file in front of him. He would have been in a foul mood if it wasn't for the fact that he knew he had the upper hand.

After dinner at JJ's last night he had returned home to read. Wanting to check something online he was annoyed to find his laptop not working. No matter what he did, once he logged on the same screen came up. No icons to click, just a blue background with April Fool written repeatedly in a rainbow of colours. He tried every trick he knew (which weren't many) but came to the conclusion that he had been Garcia'd, yet again. He didn't know how she had done it, but she had.

"What you looking so smug about?" Prentiss asked as she reached her desk.

"Nothing," he shrugged.

"Well, by the look of our favourite Tech Analysis, I would imagine that you have not learnt from last year's experience," Emily continued, giving Reid just enough warning of Penelope's approach.

"Whatever you have done with my Mini Morgan you shall return him now. That is theft or kidnapping or something and . . . and . . . a breach of my personal space," Penelope stamped a foot, to add to her verbal torrent.

"Really," Reid smiled, "And breaking into my apartment and messing with my computer is not."

"You didn't know I was doing that when you kidnapped my bear. So you still intentionally attacked my private property first," she sulked, realising that she really couldn't say much, as her own actions were now looking decidedly dodgy .

"Well," he continued smugly, "You have the ransom note. However there is now an additional condition to," Reid paused, before using Penelope's name for the bear he had captured the night before, "Mini Morgan's release."

"Anything," she gulped.

"My laptop - returned to its original state."

Penelope nodded agreement to that condition.

"I'll sort your laptop out, but really, the other part, do I really have to?" she looked pleadingly at him.

"You have to be very careful when negotiating with kidnappers, refusal to follow the instructions can have disastrous effects," Reid grimaced, "The things I have seen happen to abductees!"

"But . . . that . . . that's not fair," she continued to beg.

Reid leant under his desk and drew out his laptop. Passing it to Garcia he smiled.

"He's my laptop."

Sulking she took it and left.

It wasn't long until Morgan was at Reid's desk.

"OK Pretty Boy, what have you done to my Baby Girl this year?"

"Nothing much," Reid didn't even bother to look up from the file he was reading.

"You do know what she is capable of in that little cupboard of hers? She scares me more than Prentiss on a bad day."

"Hey, keep me out of this," Emily joined in, "Though I'm intrigued by what is in the ransom."

"Ransom," Derek raised an eyebrow, "You are seriously holding PG to ransom; brave or stupid, not sure which! She has your techno life in her hands, she can do things to you online that most people don't know are possible."

"Ah but I have something very dear to her, this year I have won without a doubt."

. . .

By lunch Garcia had called Reid through to her office. She handed the laptop over to him.

"Please can I have Mini Morgan back now?"

"No," Reid answered.

"We need to talk Junior G-man, this can't go on. As Hotch told us last year it is time we both grew up and stopped doing such childish things."

"Really?" Reid looked confused, "Was that what you were thinking last night, when you sabotaged my laptop?"

Garcia looked a little sheepish.

"Baby Genius, this affects other people. You know what Hotch said."

"Stop hiding behind Hotch," Reid continued "You were happy to still trick me after what he said last year."

"If I do as the ransom says, this is it. We stop. Not more tricks."

"Agreed," Reid offered his hand to shake on the deal.

. . .

Reid sat down at his desk and watched Penelope make her way up to Morgan's office. Prentiss scooted her chair over beside him as JJ perched on his desk.

"So, what's going on?"

"Penelope is fulfilling her ransom demand," Reid answered flatly.

"Which is?" squeaked Prentiss in excitement.

"To get Mini Morgan back, she has to get Morgan to go on a date with her."

"What?" JJ and Emily questioned in unison.

"April Fool's day is all about making people feel foolish. Garcia feels foolish asking Morgan out. I'm probably the most socially awkward person in this room, but if I can see those two should be together then it must be obvious," he paused, "No one said the end consequence of an April Fool's joke has to be something horrendous, it just has to make them feel a fool along the way, and they have both been fools for long enough."

"Whoa, that's pretty deep," JJ exclaimed, "even for you."

As Penelope opened the door to exit Morgan's office, everyone scattered. She marched down to Reid's desk.

"Now," she demanded, holding out her hand.

"Whoa," Emily interrupted, "Don't give it to her."

Penelope spun round to face her friend, giving her a glare.

"Not until we have all the details of the date."

Garcia spun back to face Reid. "You told them?"

He nodded.

"Ok, we're going to dinner at the weekend, now give!"

"No," Emily added, "We need the details after the event. You're not getting Mini Morgan back until Monday morning."

Penelope rolled her eyes. She didn't know whether to thank Reid for forcing her to finally ask Derek out or if she should kick him for letting her friends know. Either way she knew she wasn't going to get out of this one easily.

"OK . . . OK . . . Ok," she held her hands up, "I surrender, and you all win." With which she disappeared back to her office.

. . .

On his way out of the building Reid called by Garcia's office. He knocked and waited to be invited in.

"Yes," Pen snapped when she saw who it was.

Without saying a word he placed Mini Morgan back on her desk.

"I'm sorry if you're cross with me. I just want two of my friends to be happy. We see such horrible things every day; I just wanted to make people smile for a change."

Garcia got up and gave him a hug.

"But I mean it, this is it, no more April Fool's," she said as she pulled away, "Unless we team up to get the others, that could be interesting!"

"So you're not cross?" he asked tentively.

"I'm not," she smiled, "but you had better watch out for Morgan, you know how he feels about people interfering!"

Reid's face dropped. He hadn't considered what Morgan may do.

Gulping he asked; "Is he very mad?"

"Ask him yourself," she giggled, "He's behind you."

Reid turned to face Morgan, who said nothing.

"S . . .s . . .sorry," he stuttered.

Morgan pulled himself up to his full height.

"Very . . . very sorry," he continued.

"Kid, I really don't know if I should hit you or hug you," he growled

"I'd prefer it if you didn't do either, to be honest," continuing Reid added, "Does it help if I say that we have made a pack to not continue our pranks after this?"

Morgan nodded. "Glad you two have finally learnt your lesson."

. . .

**OK, really not sure about this one so please review and let me know what you think. **


End file.
